My life is beautiful. It is also chaotic, busy, complex and overall… FULL! I’m an interior designer and owner of my design firm, a TV host and personality with eight shows on the Warner Bros. Discovery (HGTV and Food Network) network, and philanthropist. That doesn’t even begin to cover being a mom to two energetic boys. So you see, life over here in Breegan world is a lot! But, I wouldn’t have it any other way! If you’re like me, you’ve probably questioned how you could possibly get everything done with only 24 hours each day. When I’m asked about finding life balance and how I do it, my advice is pretty unconventional. The technique I recommend might shock you, but it’s worth a shot if you’re feeling like you’re drowning in a sea of to-do lists. Let’s explore it together!
Time: In Short Supply and High Demand
I read a meme on Instagram that said “adult friendship is basically two people saying, ‘I haven’t seen you in forever! We should hang out more’ over and over until one of you dies.” I read that and laughed at the relatability of it all. If you’re a busy individual, you likely know how tough it is to squeeze in both large and small tasks. Often, our relationships with people outside of our households take a backseat to more pressing priorities. Life today requires so much of us. We have to juggle the responsibilities of bringing in income, raising children, taking care of our physical, mental and emotional health, and so much more. It can feel impossible.
In fact, in the beginning of my entrepreneurship journey I was told time and time again that I couldn’t do or have it all. People wondered how I would be a mother, a businesswoman, a blogger and on TV all at the same time. I can’t say that I had a perfect plan, but I knew I would figure out how to successfully navigate it, if I wanted it badly enough.
Is Life Balance Important?
We’ve all seen the seemingly perfect moms on Instagram and TikTok. Their houses are immaculate, clothing is flawlessly coordinated, and not a single hair on their heads is out of place. Even their kids seem to be impossibly well behaved. That, my friends, is because it’s all staged! Perfection simply does not exist. Don’t let the beautiful photos on social media fool you. Those highlight reels don’t show you the hours it took to clean the house and arrange the furniture. You’ll never see the effort that went into hair and makeup and ideal lighting to get the desired shot for “the gram.” The truth is, there isn’t always time to achieve every single thing you want to do in a day. Life happens, emergencies occur, appointments get canceled. The best laid plans often go awry. That’s where finding life balance comes into play. We have to figure out how to allocate time to the things that rank highly on our priority lists, and work towards them with flexibility.
The Truth About Balance
We can agree that life balance is important. But is it possible? I’ve had many ask how I handle all my life entails. A typical work week can include multiple construction site visits, meetings with staff and clients, sourcing materials, quality time with my sons, travel for speaking engagements and on-camera work. Would you believe me if I told you that’s not even half of what I do? Managing my responsibilities can leave life feeling like a whirlwind. I would be less than honest if I told you that I always remember every little thing on my tasks lists. I have multiple calendars, and sometimes it’s simply not possible to take every meeting or call.
I’m a single mom raising two boys who are in their formative years. They transcend everything else, and I dedicate a great deal of present and mindful time to only them. People tend to think being an entrepreneur means you make your own schedule and have more time. That couldn’t be further from the truth. What it actually means is you work harder than ever before because the weight of your success or failure lies in your effort, ethic and efficiency. That intensity lends itself to mom guilt if you’re not careful. I’m away from my family frequently because of career needs. I’m often choosing one essential over another equally as important element, because let’s face it, I’m one person. On several days, balance for Breegan Jane is more fiction than fact. Luckily for me, I’ve discovered something that works for my lifestyle. Maybe it will work for you as well.
A Maximalist Approach
A major part of finding life balance for me was accepting that I needed to redefine what balance would look like. I silenced the voices of naysayers and well-meaning saboteurs telling me I had to choose which parts of my life I could “have” and which I needed to forego. I believed in my own ability to do all the things I had been gifted with, and trusted my instincts. It was then that I could fully go live life on my own terms. So, thus began my maximalist approach to balance. I decided that whatever I did, I would do it to the nth degree. My balance didn’t necessarily involve balancing things at all. Instead, I ensure there is enough of me to go around for all the important things in my life by creating boundaries around each of them.
All or Nothing
When I need to accomplish a specific task for work, I go into total work mode. Sometimes I pull out all my computers, architectural plans, mood boards and notes and I work for hours. It isn’t unusual for me to stay up until 4 AM and get up a couple hours later and do it all again. I shut out the world to get the work completed. When I’m spending time with my boys I am the same way. The phones and computers get put away, and I’m all theirs. Do I miss things? Sure. I can’t be everywhere at once, so I have to say no to things in order to say yes to others. But one of my biggest tips when it comes to balancing life, is to get really good at delegation. Establish a team with strengths in the areas that benefit you, and trust them to help. Whether that’s a nanny, cleaning professional, a manager or even a landscaper, outsource! Accept that perfection is a myth, and no one is getting it right 100% of the time. Identify the parts of your life that deserve center stage. That’s where your focus should go.
Finding life balance really is important. But your idea of balance might very well differ from the next person’s, and that’s okay! What matters is that you find a way to show up for yourself and the people in your life who mean the most to you. We’re all doing life in our own ways. Much like interior design, I always suggest taking a tailored approach in order to get the most out of it. So tell me, how do you balance your life? Will you try any of my tips? Let me know in the comments!